the idea of perfection

as a self- taught and mathematically-challenged knitter, i have grown used to the fact that my knitting is not now and will never be perfect. every project i have ever embarked upon has been frogged or carries some degree of mistake (the kind that you point out to other knitters just in case they spot it and look at each other with raised eyebrows and pursed lips and mutter something about lifelines, which is also the kind of mistake that most NORMAL people would not notice and think that whatever you make is lovely and clever and special). i am not by nature a perfectionist, not since i left the prison-house that was the childhood home, where everything had to be just so, and from which i rebelled into 'that'll do'. and usually, it will do.

this does not mean that i dont strive to do things properly, and when it comes to knitting, i try pretty hard to get it right. there isnt much point in knitting lace and stuffing it up and knitting along anyway, cos its not going to look much like the pretty pictures in vlt that way. and if i was going to do that, i wouldnt bother with lace for a start.

but i am bothering with lace, and often lace bothers me. it is the sort of knitting that i do with my tongue out and tension gathering in my shoulders, forgetting to breath as i go. you would think then that i would confine myself to knitting lace with a rest/purl row. oh noooo that would be SENSIBLE! instead i decide to embark on the myrtle leaf shawl with bells. of course, hers is going great guns, growing by the minute, and i feel an urge to keep up with her. but i cant, and i wont, for a number of reasons. firstly, i frogged it three times. there was just something about the chart i wasnt reading properly. secondly, it can not be knit at night time, its too hard to tell where you're at, and black 2 ply silk is NOT for tinking. thirdly, it can not be knit with other people around. it requires full concentration, i have to count every stitch, double check everything as i go, remember to breath. so its slow going. i have done one full repeat of the main chart. there are 40 repeats required. so its going to be a long-term committment this one. but i dont care, i love it! look, see:

you know what? its perfect! there is not ONE single error in this repeat. i love that about it. its my goal to knit the rest of it, one repeat at a time, with no mistakes. just so i can have one piece of knitting that is perfect. and that piece really should be a black silk shawl. so bells will finish before me, but we will both have something beautiful at the end!

there is a bit of near-perfection in the air today. its hot, again, of course, so i cleaned the pool and went in:


i thought of you all as i splashed around on my pool noodle. i may even have giggled to myself :)

i have had to restake my cherry tomatoes as they are growing like wild things.

they are so delicious that they dont even make it upstairs, whenever i pick one i just pop it in my mouth and go all mushy at the rich sweet home grown tomato flavour. best thing in the world.

oh, apart from perfect yarn! i have some of that too. knitting camp weekend also meant some stash enhancement, in the form of some pink koigu that i bought myself and bells delivered:


(yes i just noticed that one skein is slightly lighter than the other. i dont care, its koigu).

and some gorgeous blue koigu that donni gave me. what fantastic colours:

mmmmm koigu. and now i am home alone for quite a few hours with just myrtle to keep me company. does it get any more perfect? i think not....

k xx

a bevy of knitters

bev⋅y
   /ˈbɛvi/ Spelled Pronunciation [bev-ee]
–noun, plural bev⋅ies.
1. a group of birds, as larks or quail, or animals, as roebuck, in close association.
2. a large group or collection: a bevy of boisterous sailors.

this weekend a group of birds descended upon our house for kylie's summer knitting camp (no trademark infringement intended because im pretty sure no one owns the rights to the concept of knitting camp). it wasnt really a camp anyway, most people had proper beds to sleep in, although for a house with 5 bedrooms, we still needed to put a mattress out in the lounge room!

the birds in question were of the knitting variety, though they could also be mistaken for boisterous sailors, especially after a day of quaffing large amounts of bubbly while floating in the pool. the evening conversation was rather amusing as a result.

it was so incredibly hot on saturday we did little knitting but were mercifully saved by the pool. some clever people worked out how to put up the shade sail (which is actually a real windsurfer sail):

and there were no snakes swimming with us, although today we have a frog:

we nodded briefly at australia day by putting lamb on the bbq but it was marinated greek style and the chicken was portuguese, because australia is actually a land of immigrants despite certain redneck racist appearances to the contrary. thankfully some the birds bought their mates who carry the bbq-gene, so dinner and breakfasts were wonderful.

we had pavlova and chocolate chip cookies and mini lemon meringue pies and paella and sangria, including a non-alcoholic 'blonde' one made with sparkling grape juice. yummo.

there was also some knitting. dr k became a convert to the clappy, and also learnt the basics of sock construction, and bells and i plunged into the abyss of black lace. and long tail cast ons. for a being with an opposable thumb i was alarmingly badly co-ordinated in that department, but i did get the hang of it which is lucky because i had to frog the bloody thing of course. it got a bit easier when i submitted to the discipline of stitch markers after each pattern repeat but i am still doing something wrong - this is where i got to on the second go last night but its not quite right and i will probably start again today:

i do get the feeling tho that once i get into the swing of it it will be ok and the yarn is just delicious (jaggerspun zephyr mmmmmm).

today i am at home because there is something wrong with my car, it went funny on the way to work this morning so i came home via the mechanics and am waiting to hear. after such a lovely noisy weekend it is very quiet here today, and it started raining when everyone left and hasnt stopped, which seems entirely appropriate. i am a little bit tired and a little bit blissed out at having such wonderful people in my life who will come and spend a whole weekend and fill it with love and laughter.

but to the person who took the ikea body-drawing model thing and replaced it with this:

i know where you live...

k xx

calling dr freud

last night i had a dream that my lovely friend renee and i were sitting down for coffee somewhere (could it have been paris? london perhaps?) anyway, and this girl comes up and sits next to us and she says to me 'whats the gorgeous perfume youre wearing?'. this girl is paper thin, british and wearing a rather startling long red silk dress. i look at her and say 'that new chanel one' (the name eludes me) and she looks puzzled and we look at her some more and i realise who it is and i say 'for goodness sake, the one that youre in the ad for!'. yes that was keira knightley, and no we couldnt remember the name of the perfume, but its coco mademoiselle and i do wear it, every day. i have not, however, bumped into keira knightley while doing so.

enough silliness.

k xx

rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated....

no i am not dead, i just have a job. song lyrics leap through my head, the smiths obviously, but ive quoted them before about being miserable when finding a job, but it doesnt apply because im not miserable. alanis morrisette comes next with her little ditty about irony.

of course, she doesnt really know what irony is (jane austen on the other hand knew very well....) but it IS ironic that all i ever wanted when i was doing a phd was a job and money and a normal life and well, here i am... yes its ironic. while im on the subject, i am still working two part time jobs because i have the interview on friday to make the new job official, permanent and fulltime, but i dont want to quit my 2 day job until i have the contract signed (i lie, i do want to quit, i want to quit it RIGHT NOW but other people are telling me to be sensible). so i wont quit until next week when we have the paperwork done.

good news on the new job front is that i have been able to negotiate working from home two days a week and also to include a research component, which means i can keep working on the current project to do with nursing and for which i am going to wales in march (would you believe the 6 nations rugby final is on in cardiff the night i am scheduled to land in london....more irony anyone?) and also means i can bring my own work to the new faculty and apply for grant money with some very big names in the grant-getting business. they are already sending me to a one week writing workshop, and the work itself is interesting and varied, so i am feeling pretty good about it so far. i imagine i am going to feel a whole lot better again when i get my first fulltime pay packet. its not about the money....its about the MONEY! seriously, being a student put a lot of strain on us, i will glad to see the end of it.

however, the other pains of student life are fast starting to look rosy in my retrospective glasses, as the pinch of the real world makes itself felt. not that i want to be a student again, but it can be a nice life while you have it!!

in other news, i have finished the first of my christmas gifts. no not for this year, for last year. yes yes im hopeless. i actually dont subscribe to christmas consumerism and refuse to buy stuff for anyone anymore, but i did want to make 3 people in particular something meaningful. i didnt quite plan it out right, and ended up giving helen and jane one sock each with IOU tags attached, and to george i gave a box with half a weldon's scarf still attached to the needles inside. it was pretty funny watching her pull it out of the box and asking 'am i meant to finish this?' no she wasnt, i was, and i have. its not blocked yet but its so lovely. see:


because i dont plan (did i mention that already?) i also forgot to figure out how much yarn i used on the first border and then just knitted the body to as long as i liked with no thought for leaving enough for the second border. i got lucky:

this is knittery slim sock in merlot, too slim for socks i think, perfect for lightweight vintage lace scarves. this is actually my first official long lacy summer FO, i have another scarf (victorian ruby) on the needles i can go back to, and am starting the myrtle leaf shawl from VLT in jagger spun zephyr in black this weekend.

this weekend is looking kind of special. not because its australia day (tho some lamb might find its way on the barbie and there was talk of a pavlova) but because a whole heap of lovely knitty people are coming to spend the whole weekend and im so excited i cant stand it! hurry up and get here already! i promise i got the snake out of the pool :) (plus also the frog and the funnel web).....

kxx

snakes alive

warning: if you are squeamish or planning on swimming in this pool anytime soon (you know who you are) you might want to look away now. yesterday there was a snake in the pool. at first i thought it was just a long piece of bark, we get that, being surrounded by gum trees:

but no, it was a snake. we get them too, apparently, being surrounded by gum trees. the wires person who came to fish it out thought it might have been a python but on closer examination of this picture:

i am pretty sure it was a red bellied black snake. it had managed to get itself out of the pool before we could catch it, and has slithered back into the shrubbery around the pool fence i think, where im sure its doing good deeds by getting rid of rats. oh yes, we get them here too apparently.

whats more of a worry is that the snake was the best part about yesterday. i worked mostly from home because i had a guy coming to finish installing new fly screens and he is an older gentleman, from central europe, and a right royal pain in the arse. he wanted to argue with me about what did or didnt need doing, and failed to get the message that we just wanted them ALL done regardless of what he thought of their condition, and in fact, he had agreed to do them all the first time he came, so of course he was shitty and didnt leave till 730pm.

and i had a crap working from home day with a heap of hierarchy politics going on in my sydney job, and that upset me, but it helps to confirm that the other path i am taking is the right one, because i was looking forward to coming back here today (sick, i know), and also confirms that the hunch i have been developing over the last few years, that australia's academic historians are arrogant self-important ego-maniacs, is in fact correct, and really, i dont want to be one.

give me a snake anyday. at least you know its going to bite you, not pretend its your friend, ally or mentor just before it sinks its fangs in.

k xx

making time

who knew you could do so much with so little time?! despite my protestations about working almost full time (2 x part time) i have managed to fit in quite a lot this week.

on thursday i worked at my city job and came home early to the smell of over ripe bananas in the kitchen. interestingly, someone bought me a very appropriately titled cooking book for christmas, donna hay's no time to cook. in it was a recipe for 'simple banana bread' and given that most of my attempts at banana bread have been anything but simple i decided to give this one a go. it never ceases to amaze me that you can start with this:

and end up with this:


it was delicious, best banana bread ever. i am going to make it again and again.

i made time for knitting at work by taking the second of the monkey socks that i owe bells for her christmas present and forcing myself to take a full lunch hour (or thereabouts) and work through one whole pattern repeat in between bites of my ham, roast capsicum and avocado sandwich (they have a great sandwich bar in the uni food court - bonus). at this rate, monkey number two will be finished in 6 more lunch hours, plus maybe a night time of heel turning and toe grafting. it felt good to be disciplined about it.

i also discovered that i had, quite by accident, knitted the required amount of drop stitch pattern repeats for the body of the weldon's scarf, and could start the second border. no crack scales required. i am pretty confident i have enough yarn, as i started with more than the pattern calls for. it took me quite some time to get my head around how to start a knitted on border that runs at 90 degrees to the body of the scarf. the way the pattern was written made no sense to me, and the more i thought about what they were asking the less sense it made. so i decided to just knit it like they said anyway and see what happened. the issue was that i had to crochet cast on 36 stitches, but the way the pattern read it would be on to the right hand needle and i didnt think you could do that. but you can, and i did, it was a bit awkward, but it worked and i am now working horizontal to the vertical body, picking up body stitches and knitting them to the border every second row:


thats why im not a pattern designer see! anyway, it too will be finished with a few more night time knitting hours.

we have had a lovely weekend, doing some neglected house and yard work yesterday, getting all the washing done, home made pizza for dinner, even watched a movie on dvd. and then today we went off for a bit of a four wheel drive adventure, looking for a secret route to the old north road that the convicts built. there is a place where you can drive on to it, but we couldnt find it, and made do with trekking for a while on the shepherds gully track part of it. we could see parts of the original stone road under the leaves and rubble, and then we found a fantastic bridge-type part made of perfectly hewn sandstone blocks, with a tunnel under it to drain the water under the road. as i scrambled back up the bank from the tunnel, i pulled myself up using one of the large paving rocks, and i thought, i just touched a rock that a convict touched. sounds weird, but it was pretty amazing. 200 years ago they built that road, and its still there, it was pretty magic. we had a lovely lunch at the settlers arms at st albans and then drove back the other way, meaning we took two ferries to cross the hawkesbury. very cool.

and i still found time to stop and smell the roses. well, the tomatoes anyway. the cherry tom plants in pots are going mental,

and there were two red ones, i picked the smaller one (not pictured) because it looked red but when i got it inside it was still a bit orange. it was a bit tart but really sweet as well, yummo. i cant wait to eat the rest of them. is there a trick to knowing when to pick them, or how long to leave them to ripen etc? i am very impatient with these things....well ok with most things, i admit it.

speaking of which, there is a border needing knitting. theres no rest for the wicked you know!
kxx

there are no knitting police

are there bells? no there are not. yet inside my head it is totalitarian knitting-police state. i have been feeling like a bit of a loser on the knitting front, not able to keep up with the amazing output of some of the bloggers i read, overwhelmed by the choices on ravelry, even a little bit freaked out by my increasing stash. i am starting to understand why i have resisted a major stash enhancement. i am not good at having yarn sitting around. i want to make stuff with it. there is currently too much of it sitting over there in that basket taunting me with its loveliness and reminding me how little time i have to knit.

this has become majorly exacerbated lately with the taking on of a new job and its attendant travelling time (for such a huge country, our public transport really sux). i am not even finished my first week and it is very obvious to me that i am going to be lucky to get an hour or two of knitting time a day. you cant get a lot done in two hours a day.

and i made it worse for myself by buying this book:

and falling madly in love with this shawl:



and i am going to do it in malabrigo too. i just dont know when! bells and i are starting the myrtle leaf shawl soon and i still have two scarves to finish- one of which is intended as a gift, but it is nearly there:

my problem here is that i dont know how much yarn it took me to do the first border so i am not sure when to stop the length to knit the second border. i need some crack scales.

my other problem is that i knitted some people a single sock each for christmas, including my very first monkey (which i LOVED making, what a great pattern), and i gifted them with IOU tags attached. they need to be finished in the next two weeks as well.

after this though, i am going to have to take the pressure off myself to produce outcomes, and go back to knitting as a process. i promised my nieces some cardigans but i just wont have time, and i dont knit to get more stressed, i knit to unwind. so a shift of focus will be required to oust the police state. maybe i need a knitting buddha!

at least today has dawned cool and cloudy with the arrival of a good southerly, pushing the heatwave out to sea. there was talk of bushfires yesterday, but this morning it looks like this:

and i dont have to drive to work today. thats something.

knitting, anyone?

k xx

squeak squeak

i am now officially a mouse, chained to the wheel of full time employment. thats the sound i make as a run around and around. this is the wheel to which i am chained:

of course, its not actually as bad as that. in fact its kind of good. i still have my two day a week history association job but will be quitting it soon because i have been offered a full time job (i think i may have talked about this before!) for which i cant be interviewed and hence officially appointed until late january. in the meantime, i am on a short term 3 day a week contract. which means i am here (uow) three days and there (unsw) two days. i have had many dilemmas about the travelling issue (it is a nearly 2 hour drive from home to uow, and there are no trains that get me here in reasonable time in the morning, so i must waste 4 hours a day driving when i could be knitting!) but if i have a day at in sydney in between each wollongong day it wont be too bad, and i can work up to flexible arrangements as i settle into the job more.

so far it seems like an interesting job, a lot to take care of, many things to manage at once, and some of it dead boring, but the opportunities it presents are worthwhile, and to be honest, i am sick to death of being the poor one. its time i earnt some good money, to put back at least some of what i have taken out over the last 10 years, and because i am grown up enough now to do that!

so while im sure the novelty will pass soon enough, for today at least, i am happy to be squeaking away.

k xx

two thousand and nine

and so it begins, another year passes, another year older. wiser? hmmm. perhaps. in some ways yes. in some no, same old same old. but in many ways 2008 was our annus horribilus and now that its over it feels like the end of an era, and i think this is a good thing. new beginnings and all that. starting a new year not being a student, with a new job to go to next monday (to become full time in another month or so), and new horizons to explore. i am pretty confident 2009 will be a good vintage.

we saw the new year in just us and the dogs, with a seafood bbq and only ventured out in search of ice cream, but our favourite place was shut (shut, on new years eve, when all the restaurants around it were buzzing! i mean, really) and settled for something slightly less satisfying from down at manly. lots of people about. beautiful summer evening. we came home, watched one episode of boston legal and crashed by 1030. the reason for this early evening is that we decided yesterday we would go for a little stroll on the waratah track in the national park behind us, my dad had this great idea to give us a 'bushwalks in sydney' book and we read about this walk and it sounded pretty easy. it wasnt really hard as far as bushwalks go, but it was hot yesterday and there were a couple of steep climbs, and some of us arent getting any younger! if i made new years resolutions one of them would be something about improving fitness, but this is one of my perpetual life-projects anyway. after yesterday tho, i do feel somewhat more motivated to actually put in a bit more effort on that front.

anyway, we slept it off while there was some big fireworks thing going on in town, then 2009 dawned hot and sunny, and with me feeling a bit sore and sorry! we did some gardening, had scrambled eggs for breakfast, a bit of house cleaning in preparation for visitors this weekend, and then a long loll around in the pool. i think this is a rather auspicious beginning to the year. harmonious and domestic. i think i will make this my theme. and this picture kind of sums it up, no?

hope everyone else had a good one and isnt feeling too bad this side of the parties. and i really hope 2009 brings some peace and joy to the world, and some sense to those determined to stuff it up.

k xx

i'm ba-ack

and have been for a few days but what with unpacking and washing and trying to enjoy this week off, i am not up to much blogging. and there has not been much knitting really, just a lot of length added to the weldons lace scarf. it made for good car knitting. we had a lovely time away, it was good to be with family and we went for lots of drives and i saw fraser island for the first time. we didnt go over as it was too busy but we watched the ferry go over and then drove the car down onto the beach at inskipp point without deflating the tyres and got stuck in the sand. just for a little while. we got out with some help. next time, we take the proper equipment! then we went walking in the forest behind my dads place where possum picked up a tick, even tho she had a tick collar on, and started to show signs of paralysis so we drive up to the one and only vet open in hervey bay and he gave her the anti-tick serum which of course she had a bad reaction to, requiring a shot of adrenalin. i was a bit scared for her for a minute there, but she is ok. it wouldnt be a christmas away without one of our dogs getting ticked. sigh.

trent took some lovely photos which i will blog once i get around to resizing them. i might have something more interesting to show and tell by then, and i hope to get around to reading all the posts in my blogroll!

have a safe new years whatever you are doing. personally, i cant wait to see the back of 2008.

k xx

away

we are packing the car about to head up the highway to my dads place in queensland for christmas. i am, despite myself, looking forward to it. even the car trip is fun when you are a knitter!

hope everyone has a great week, whatever you do with it, see you on the 29th.

k xx

oh happy happy joy joy

so apparently my pollyanna attempt wasnt entirely convincing. meh. im no pollyanna, i know that. but i tried! today, i am genuinely happy tho. some good things happened yesterday, so its hard to stay grumpy forever.

firstly i got a little pressie in the mail. it might have been some malabrigo sock yarn in Tiziano Red. it is the most perfect colour for me, and is that not the best name for a red?! malabrigo sock yarn is designed to make you feel better about things all round. thank you, you little elf.

secondly, our second family christmas bbq here went very well and everyone had fun, and everyone loved their presents, and books were opened and read, and i was presented with a lovely box set of the harry potters. as if i needed an excuse to read them again! (btw, i finished atonement over coffee this morning. sigh. so sad, and beautiful. the ending is a bit different to the movie, i think the movie ending might be actually better, but otherwise its very faithful and the book is terrific).

tonight we are doing family dinner out, same people but all together in one place, instead of spread over two nights here. we are going to bbq king in goulburn st which im pretty sure is my favourite chinese restaurant in the known universe. hmmm bbq pork and duck....

but i digress.

tomorrow night i am hoping to get to snb in the city, and friday night we are having drinks and dinner with a visiting academic friend from the US and his wife, and some of our mutual academic friends from wollongong. after much soul searching, i decided to take them all to the latest sensation, din tai fung, for dumplings. hmmm dumplings.

sorry. no, this is not homer simpson writing on my blog.

then saturday we have our dog club christmas picnic, and then sunday the day trip to The Can then on monday we set out for the land of the queen (or the redneck). (god i wish my father had chosen to retire in tasmania, or the southern highlands. somewhere cool and sophisticated, for gods sake. anyway...)

so all this is to look forward to. but wait, theres more.

remember i mentioned i had been offered a job? i did some soul searching and talked to lots of people about it, and i decided to go for it. its a full time job, but because it was offered to me especially, they have changed the nature of the job a little to make it more flexible and to introduce a research component. so as well as developing and managing research projects for the faculty, i will be able to develop projects of my own, and work with others on their research. it is in health, not arts, which is not such a huge shift for me as i worked in health a long time ago, and there is an opportunity for me to bring my social theory to health projects, so i think its a good opportunity. and to be quite frank, arts faculties are dying a slow painful and protracted death. not that i think this is a good thing, because we always need critical thinking, now more than ever, but to be honest, in the race to the cash, arts faculties have merely raced to the bottom and the amount of critical thinking actually going on is pretty light on the ground. i am glad to be out of it.

so anyway, i applied through all the proper channels so that we can make sure everything looks legit, and they want to do the whole interview thing, but we couldnt find a mutual date until january 23. so yesterday they asked me if i would start the job now, just for 3 days a week (in recognition of the fact that i do have a 2 day a week job elsewhere, and i can not be expected to quit it until i have the other contract signed and in my hand) on a short term contract. i said yes. i start on jan 5, but have to go down this friday to sort it all out. i think i am quite excited, and of course i am just thrilled that they are quite keen to get me by the looks of things, and having done the job for a few weeks on a flexible arrangement (including working from home) means it will be easier for me to negotiate more of the same for the full time gig. it is funny how things work out though, isnt it?

all of this is in the future of course. so in the interest of keeping the joy in the moment, i got a couple of photos around the place last night before my camera batteries died. i am very pleased that since we moved here trent has been able to do lots of more training with jem, and he has bought some weave poles. last night they did some excellent training. here is jem weaving:


here is jem with his post-weave reward:

and here is the single big tomato (lots more have appeared on the cherry plant) growing every day:

i hope i get more of these on this plant. so far nothing on the roma...are they usually slower?

now i have some work to do.

k xx

trying pollyanna

i am under threat to post something positive today by someone who took offence to my little vomit of negativity yesterday. not any of you, who made lovely understanding supportive comments. perhaps i was a bit harsh. but sometimes when you feel sick and you throw up you feel a bit better afterwards. so im going to try and be a bit of a pollyanna today, not purely because i have been threatened, but also because i am actually enjoying reading peoples happy christmas blogs (see for example quiltingmick and kuka), and maybe, just maybe, there are some good things going on as well.

firstly, lets be clear. i am by nature anti-social, except where knitting is concerned. i dont like groups, i get self-conscious and anxious and i just want to go sit in a corner and read. i was always always like this, as long as i can remember. at primary school i had my two best friends and that was it. i was happy that way. i am happy that way now. so enforced socialising like what happens at this time of year is really hard. secondly, i come with a whole heap of fucked up baggage about christmas and of course i know that i still tend to opt for pessimism and cynicism rather than have expectations dashed, yet again. i also know its possible to change that, and to have good experiences. i have had plenty of those too, and so far this year has not actually been BAD.

it has been nice to buy books for kids and to see them actually sit down and start reading. it has been nice to plan hand knitted gifts for some people, and i am actually looking forward to seeing my dad, really. i am making a conscious effort to try and improve our relationship, so it will be a step in the right direction.

i am, however, a little annoyed that i have not had time to do all the stuff i would really like to do, like make my own mince pies or my favourite ice cream pudding, or to actually FINISH hand knitted gifts for everyone. only some people are getting things and they wont even be finished! so maybe thats why i was a bit bah humbug yesterday (quiet down the back). perhaps next year if i plan a bit better it will be better all round.

and i am really looking forward to a daytrip to canberra this coming sunday where i will be very comfortable in a large group of knitters, eating cupcakes.

see, i can do pollyanna. sort of :)

k xx

bah humbug

i have been trying not to whinge about christmas and trying to find my own peace with it, but really, im over it. on two fronts - family, and consumerism.

i dont have a close family. this year i have an in-law family to deal with, which includes a lot of kids. we entertained some of them here yesterday and are doing so again tonight. most of the time they are good fun, but i do find it hard work. i find being pleasant for hours at a time around most people really hard work. im tired already.

then we have a drive to queensland to see my dad to whom i am not close really but it seems like the right thing to do. for whom, i wonder? for what purpose? out of misplaced guilt for time lost that will never come back? in a pathetic attempt to recreate some sense of family where there is none, and hasnt been for many decades?

so the whole family thing rings really hollow with me, and attempts to redefine it just seem silly this year, for some reason. it just doesnt sit well.

and the consumerism. good lord. did someone mention there was an economic meltdown, or do we just continue merrily like lemmings until we have really fallen over the edge of the cliff and there is no one else to blame? i saw a bit of ellen today. she is doing this christmas giveaway where she gives stuff to her audience. clothes and diamonds and electronics. does she stop to think about the children who slaved to dig up those diamons, to sew those clothes? her audience sure dont, they jump and scream and some of them cry like something important just happened. its disgusting. ellen, where is my world peace? my end to hunger and poverty and oppression? oh what, it costs too much? silly me.

so you know, im over it. call me scrooge, whatever.

k xx

mojo

its back! my reading mojo that is. and i have christmas to thank. let me explain.

i hate christmas shopping, usually because people are so bloody rude, and because i stress out too much about getting the right thing. this year i have children to buy for, long lost in-law nieces (9 and 10) and a nephew (16), and in-law step-children? (i cant explain the nature of that relationship, too complicated) twin boys (10) and a most unusual girl (11). trent has taken the latter out today to buy her a drum kit. he was in a band once, as a drummer not a musician (haha) but her mum is paying for that. i struggled long and hard with what to buy all these kids - what do you get kids who already have all the toys? i have this thing about kids and books, that i should be the one to take responsibility for this part of their development in some way, so i spent a long time poring over the volumes available. eventually they all got something, but i walked out of that book store with nothing for myself. i havent bought myself a fiction book in the longest time, but i noticed some very attractive titles while there, and later that night, trent and i went out for dinner at the latest sensation and stopped by kinokunya on our way there. i picked up a few things:

the top two were only $9 for both, and i have read 'what maisie knew' already, but could easily go there again, and i looooooooved the movie of atonement and from what i hear this is his best book in ages, and the road, well i love cormac mccarthy and havent read this one yet, and the steve toltz? rave reviews, shortlisted for the booker, very funny beginning. thats one for the week of christmas itself when we will be in queensland visiting my dad and wondering what the hell we drove all that way to sweat in front of the aircon for. at any rate, i was very pleased to have felt the urge to want to buy books that are somewhat more substantial than pictures of socks, or lace knitting charts.

i also appear to have some gardening mojo. i never thought i did. i am not a tender by nature. i shove them in and wait for something to happen and wonder why they get covered in pests or wilt away. most of the things i planted in the pots however are taking off. one rocket plant is a bit browny and the coriander is not growing because its been too bloody wet, believe it or not, but last week i staked and fed the tomatoes and this morning i discovered this:

yes! a tomato! this is a normal big tomato, the cherry toms also have three or four fruit on them:

the roma hasnt flowered yet but its growing, and i just fed it again now, so im sure it will in time. i am quite excited about this small event.

i am also a bit excited about my lace knitting mojo. not that i am some kind of expert, but last night i finished the first border and turned it to knit the body of the scarf, in the wonderful elongated stitch pattern. i turned the corner no problem but the pattern said to put that last cast off stitch onto a stitch holder and then put it back on the needle after you had picked up all the straight edge stitches, but i didnt see why that was necessary (it would have meant cutting the yarn anyway, why would i do that?) so maybe i finished on the wrong side or something, but i just turned the work 90 degrees, keeping the last cast off stitch on the needle and picked up the rest of them as i was supposed to. it looks fine, and worked fine, so yet again i learn that the pattern is not the word of god and i will not be struck down if i deviate from it in some way. anyway, here it is as i start moving up the body:

there are a few little mistakes but nothing that affects the overall look and that wont block out, and i wont repeat them when i get to the other border, and i am really pleased with it. it LOOKS victorian, if you know what i mean!

anyway, now i have presents to wrap. hope you are all having a good weekend.
kxx

happy amazon dance

is there any more joyful symbol than this:

or any more joyful sight than this at your door when you get home from work:

and you do a little happy dance because you know exactly what it is and you only ordered it 2 weeks ago and the estimated date of arrival was january 6 and here it is a whole month ahead of schedule! so you take it inside and open it up and think what is this? the new bubble wrap? please!

but it doesnt matter because its what under the plastic that counts:

yes folks thats right, my very own copy of victorian lace today. more happy dance. i dont think ive ever been as enarmoured of a knitting book as i am of this one - history, patterns AND techniques all in the one beautiful volume. i am pretty sure i want to knit about 90% of the things in here. i am already working on two, victorian ruby, and the weldon's wide and handsome border scarf, and i have yarn for a melon shawl and am currently stalking some black silk blend for a myrtle leaf shawl. will it never end? no it wont. although the weldon scarf is now nearly at the end of the second chart repeat of the first border:

one more repeat to go then i switch to the body. this is taking a while as there are only so many minutes in the day of optimal lace knitting time given the high concentration factor required.

and arent those sunnyboys multitalented little things. do you have one yet?! i think i need another.....

k xx

our sunday tradition

since we moved, trent and i have developed a new sunday evening tradition, when we are home, which means going down to dee why (about 10 minutes drive away) for fish and chips for dinner. we have found an excellent take away shop, where you can pick the sort of fish you want, and how you want it cooked, and we go across the road and sit on benches looking at the ocean. i am quite taken with dee why, its got a really nice set up and there are always people out and about, walking, picnicking, kids playing ball:

it doesnt feel pretentious, like so many of sydneys beaches are. and every time we have been it has been windy and cloudy and quite cool, which is weird, but makes for good photos (warning, more flora and fauna shots to follow!). here is the southern point of the beach walk:

and the view across to long reef:

there are crabs:

and pelicans:

and very impressive cliffs with houses perched right on them.

i am not allowed to blog about how this is where trent spent the first 6 years of his life and how many fond memories of the area he has, so i wont, i will just post this photo instead:

we spent most of the rest of yesterday digging out lantana and making numerous trips to the tip (sigh), thankfully it was somewhat cooler than saturday, but i got no knitting done at all! i finished sock number one of the sweetie pie socks on saturday night - it is a very multicultural sock, having a german heel and a french toe:


i did a single purl stitch on the side of the foot every second row the whole way down, including purling the decreases at the toe, just to give it some detail to try and match the purls in the heel, and i am quite taken with the seam stitch down the back of the heel, interestingly. at first i didnt like it, but its grown on me, and i am pretty sure i am going to do all of my plain sock heels this way from now on.

now i need to get back to some serious lace work, so i have something more interesting to post!

k xx

fauna and flora

at the risk of stating the obvious, goddamn its hot here today. i went to the shops early and it was 30C at 10am. it looked like bushfire weather, and im sure theres going to be many more days like that over the next few months. this photo really doesnt pick up the orangey haze:

but lets just agree it was hot. i had some gardening to do, and normally i avoid the heat like the plague, but i really want my pots to thrive, so i gathered my tools (yes i went to bunnings by myself, and yes i also went to bakers delight):

i lathered up and set to tending, staking, and putting some basil in pots. i stopped for a while to watch a wedge-tailed eagle circle above, just slowly going round and round, maybe looking for rabbits, or snakes.

i have seen one shed skin, only small, and some plumbers who were here last week reckon they saw a red bellied black snake. i am a little dubious, but the dogs know there are snakes about. its a little freaky. anyway, here are the pots now, complete with basil.

today they got a drink of seasol, some garlic spray, some tomato food, and a good dusting, i am not entirely sure the pots are pest free although a golden orb spider faithfully builds her beautiful web above the pots every night. so far most things are growing, tho some of the coriander has gone yellow (too much water?) and the rocket browned off in parts. but there are little flowers on some of the tomatoes, and this is still really an experiment, i dont know what will really work here yet. the lettuce are good tho:

i am still experimenting with socks too. bells noted that i frog a lot, and i do if i really cant get away with it. complicated lace that was really hard and is only a small mistake i can let slide, but something that youre going to wear, well it has to be right really. i did frog the picot socks completely and have restarted, they are humming along:


the picot cuff has come up great, and the eyelets are for a thin red satin ribbon. i gave up on the purl inset down the sides but i have since realised that i did it wrong, i need to only purl every second row. d'oh. but they have a lovely german heel which doesnt show up well in this photo:

and i am adding a string of purls (haha) all the way down the side of the foot just to give it some detail to try and match the picot edge (so on every second round, needles 1 and 3 have a purl one stitch in from the instep stitches if that makes sense). anyway, the colour is gorgeous.

i want to get this one sock finished so i can go back to my lace, but its too hot to concentrate on anything other than socks today. i am also a little distracted because i have just been offered a full time research management job at my old uni, which is very attractive, but means leaving my little history job, and i feel bad about doing that....but i will only take the job if we can arrange telecommuting cos im not driving 2 hours each way every day, so negotiations should commence on monday. will keep you posted.

did i mention its hot?

k xx