"Discussing her daily food intake with the mag, Stewart reports typical paranoid carbophobia behaviour, such as scooping the soft bread out of bagels.
"Everyone in the US scoops out their bagels, so I do it when I come back to the UK, too. I always think, why do you need that extra bread?" Geez, I dunno. Maybe to stop you collapsing into unconsciousness because you're really, really hungry."
has the world gone entirely mad? oh dont answer, its a rhetorical question. some days all i can do is shake my head at how entirely fucked up our priorities have become. dont get me started on yesterdays story about the pakistani guy held by asio and 'questioned' about terrorism. or todays one about the guy whos been in detention for 5 years while in possession of a valid visa.
the anger that i feel at these things is a very motivating factor for me right now - the conclusion of The Pensky File, which is ostensibly a work of australian history - tries to draw links between the historical ways in which people have been marginalised in australian society and the way we keep those processes happening today. i am giving a paper about it in a few weeks time at a conference, so a bit of ire should get me worked up.
this anger is also extremely motivating in relation to finishing. i am angry that i have been stuffed around by bad advice for such a long time by people who should know better, that i have not been supported properly, that i have been a pawn in other peoples power games. my anger at this is making me determined to finish it when people said i couldnt. in the last two and a half weeks i have written 11,000 words. i had been told that it would take me 6 weeks to write this many and so there was no possible way i could finish by christmas. i have nearly 50, 000 words and only need to write another 20 - 30, 000 which suddenly sounds like hardly any at all. so, you can do the math...
i feel like doing a bit of jude's weeweejiggle at the thought of how quickly i am getting through it, how fast the light at the end of the tunnel approaches. i am getting little tastes of what it might feel like to be free, and a reminder of what life was like before i had this thing hanging over me all the time. i cant quite explain what its been like - its like some dark shadow following you around, tapping you on the shoulder everytime you might want to think about something else, have a sit down, do some knitting, god forbid.
well not anymore mr pensky file demon shadow. 4 weeks and you are gone gone gone.
and then i can teach myself how to spin. hehehehehe....
i have no batteries in my camera and they are too expensive to buy new ones right now so i have tried to take some 'update' shots with my mobile (new one..its red..) ...bear with me here...ooh it worked..
first, wet dogs after a run up the beach (yes the sun is right in their eyes, sorry guys!):
second, pensky file in real life (see it does really exist!):
third, the second of the bendi/patonyle contrast sock:
and finally, the waving lace progress. because i really am being very disciplined and only knitting at night time, this is slow going, and i keep mis-reading the pattern and needing to go back but now i am at the heel and its coming up very nicely:
the heel is a different pattern to my usual, its a two row repeat, row one is 'slip one purlwise (wyb) k1 repeat' and the second row is 'slip one purlwise (wyf) purl to end'. anyone know what this is called, its looking pretty so far. i love this sock, cant wait to wear it!
and just so you know i am reading everyone elses blogs and trying to stay up to date but dont have much time for commenting at the moment. will try to do better.
k xx
6 comments:
No, no, dont comment we know youre reading, save those words for the pensky file...very glad that its motoring along so nicely. Keep the momentum and good feelings going.
We were watching 4corners last night about undecided voters, and my Mum kept saying "are people really that stupid that they think that?"
Yup, people really *are* that stupid. There's a lot of 'em, and they vote. For guvments that do just those sort of things. Scary.
I began to feel very much the same way towards the end of mine as well. Still do in some respects. About the lack of support and the pawn-iness. But it's a heckuva feeling to wear the puffy hat! :D
Good job on the pensky file Miss Kylie! Soooo proud of you, you go girl! And use all that angry energy for productive purposes. Finished by Christmas? Yeeehah!!
xxx
Use the anger! You go girl - the end is in sight!!
Good work on the socks, too :)
I think you're doing an eye of partridge heel - well, sort of. EoP does alternating knit rows where on every second knit row, you'll slip 2, then k1, sl1. So maybe you're doing something with a different name!
that's an impressive mobile phone camera! Oh, the socks aren't bad either ;)
Good to hear you're powering through the Pensky file.
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