slow going

hehehe thats so cool that people are now calling the pensky file the pesky file. nothing freudian about our spider (see comments to last post). it is pesky. it is like a mozzie buzzing around your head while youre trying to sleep on a hot night. you slap at it and slap at it and then eventually yell at it to bugger off!

thank you also for the feedback re the personal nature of blogging. the heavy-sayers, interestingly, were non-bloggers. also people who i usually have to prise open like a clam shell to get 'feelings' out of, so i think they are a little put off at times by the whole blogging thing. at times i do worry about the potential problems of public diary keeping, of sorts. i have gone back and editted some posts at times because i have said too much or given too many clues as to who i might be talking about.

but yeah. its my bloggy and i'll cry if i want to.

i am finding my tendencies to be brutally honest are more and more pressing the more i hang around with academic types. on thursday i was so agitated that i had to drive to sydney to be around 'normal' people. ok, they were dog people, so not quite normal. but better. and today i have had another rather heated conversation with one of them about paternalism, patronisation and sexism. i didnt think that stuff happened anymore but now i think a lot of the 'problems' i have are of a gendered nature, that i wouldnt be spoken to, or given the advice, that i am if i were a bloke.

i guess i dont expect that kind of behaviour from educated types, so its more disillusioning than it would otherwise be.

and i didnt have any expectation when i started of being able to change the world, but doing this thing has made me completely re-assess what is important in this life, and i think really that thats a good thing. if nothing else comes of it, thats good.

speaking of which, it is slow going on the pesky file today. words are stuck somewhere between my dried out brain and my slow fingers. i am tired from a long weekend in the very hot heat of camden practising not-chasing sheep around a ring (no paddock this weekend thank god). miss possum and i did a lot of standing around looking at sheep and trying not to bark at them (nothingness being the objective). she did pretty good. i didnt bark much either.

i did do some knitting, waving lace on sat and the contrast socks on sunday. i have just slipped the waving lace over my foot and am extremely pleased. check it out (mobile phone photo):


is there anything more one need achieve in life than hand knitted lace socks that fit perfectly and feel like silk?

i think not.

k xx